Strengths and areas of improving in my writing

Strengths

*Good introduction:
It explains the situation in a way that is interesting for the reader. The reader knows what to look forward in the essay. Also my main idea or thesis is clear.

*Good structure
The essay is well structured and the paragraphs too.

Areas of improvement

*Lack of details:
I can give the reader more details to help them understand my point of view and what I am trying to express.

*Inconclusive conclusion
Tell the reader what I learned and summarize my experience to give a clear conclusion to my journey and what it meant to me.